Barry Glendenning's Cheltenham Diary

Festival ogles the ladies ... It was Ladies' Day at the Festival, with the attendant Lovely Girls competitions that occasion entails: Best Dressed, Best Hat and Best Accessories - mercifully, the line was drawn at a sandwich-making competition. A three-minute "flashmob" aerobics session before racing helped raise awareness of . . . something and was only marginally less disturbing than the sight of Irish jockey Ken Whelan's impromptu streak from the weighing room for a spot of riverdancing in the parade ring the previous afternoon. ... and so does Big Mac The sight of John McCririck cosying up to attractive, scared-looking young ladies is not new. After seeing him interview the Festival's youngest bookie, Lucy Hazell, 18, on Channel 4 yesterday, we scurried down to the jungle to see what his normal go-to gal, Ellen Martin, made of being so publicly usurped. "She's a lovely girl and I have no problem with the competition, bring it on!" laughed the Irish layer. "Any man who has half a brain will put his wife or daughter on the box, because it's human nature; men can't resist going up to the woman, y'know?" The Diary knows; our visit to Martin's pitch cost us £20. Trophy man bows out A bowler hat-wearing doyen of the winner's enclosure since the days of Arkle and Mill House, Nigel Dimmer retires from his role as custodian of the Festival trophies today. The local jeweller was tearful as he reminisced, but cited general wear and tear as the main reason for handing in his polish and duster. "Last year, my plates of meat were quite sore, but I really got into training and they're not too bad today," said Dimmer. "I don't want to upset anyone at the racecourse but three days, to me, was magnificent. But the fourth day . . . oh dear. I hope whoever takes over from me has as much pleasure as I've had. And I hope they can find another role for me here, however menial. I'd clean the toilets if asked."