Doctor Who: Flesh and Stone – series 31, episode five

SPOILER ALERT : This weekly blog is for those who have been watching Doctor Who on BBC1. Don’t read ahead if you haven’t seen episode five. Dan Martin’s episode four blog “A forest in a bottle on a spaceship in a maze. Have I impressed you yet Amy Pond?” I’m just going to come right out and say it. Flesh and Stone can lay credible claim to being the greatest episode of Doctor Who there has ever been. That’s better than Genesis Of The Daleks and better than City Of Death and better than Tomb Of The Cybermen and, yes, better than Blink . It’s just ridiculously good – so much that there’s scarcely any point in picking out moments because there was an iconic sequence every couple of seconds. Amy’s creepy countdown; “I made him say comfy chairs,” the oxygen factory; the clerics being erased one by one; “I think the Angels are laughing”; the moment when the Angel starts to move… You literally have to keep catching your breath. And yet its simplicity is the main reason that the episode works: Flesh and Stone is really little more than a base-under-siege chase with a team being picked off, one by one. It’s a format that has worked for Doctor Who for 50 years – which may be what makes this episode feel more like a classic classic story than any since the show’s revival. And while Moffat’s intricate plotting is fast becoming his default setting, it’s refreshing that this episode doesn’t have a complex story-concertina in which everything gets sorted out. Instead, it comes down to the gravity going off – with the Angels tumbling down into the crack counting as another of an embarrassment of classic scenes. ‘Scary’ doesn’t begin to cut it. The Angels’ menace factor is cranked up as the one thing you think you know about them is inverted. Can you imagine being Amy? Not blinking is scary enough – imagine not being able to open your eyes for an hour. Alone. Trying to navigate a forest blindfolded with Angels advancing. Having to ‘walk like you can see.’ Your brain might know that Amy is going to make it, but that doesn’t stop you falling off your chair when she does. “I will die in the knowledge that my courage did not desert me at the end.” If we must pick a standout scene it is surely Father Octavian’s death: despair creeps over Matt Smith’s face as he realises he’s going to have to leave him to die; Octavian’s final speech weeps with honour and elegance; that final, brutal snap of the neck. “You’ll see me again soon, when the Pandorica opens. I remember it well.” Theories on River Song then please. I’m buying the idea that she’s his mother, or future-Amy – we’re no longer sure if she’s even his wife. We do know she’s been a bad girl. Was the man she killed the Doctor? It’s lovely how he warms to her by the end, despite what he knows (and indeed, doesn’t know). We can be pretty sure she’ll be back for the finale. “You are sweet, Doctor, but I really wasn’t suggesting anything so long term.” And then. AND THEN. Another swerve to knock you back off your chair again, as Amy pounces on the Doctor. And it’s hilarious. There’s going to be letters about this for sure – but it’s worth remembering that this isn’t Rose Tyler simpering. After her ordeal it’s unsurprising that Amy is looking to get laid with the nearest thing available. This is humanity at its most basic lustful: jumping a hapless alien professor. Helpfully this also sets up a neat mini-cliffhanger to ensure next week’s episode is not quite so inevitably disappointing. With Love Echoes of Tomb Of The Cybermen-era Patrick Troughton, and a dark menace that riffs on The Talons Of Weng Chiang and Pyramids Of Mars . And a nice continuity nod to the Cyberking in The Next Doctor , and an explanation of why nobody remembers it. Next Week! The vampires of Venice, and the return of Rory. But really, how is anything now going to compare to this? Season 2 Episode 1: The Robot Revolution Episode 2: Lux Episode 3: The Well Episode 4: Lucky Day Episode 5: The Story and the Engine Episode 6: The Interstellar Song Contest Episode 7: Wish World Episode 8: The Reality War Season 1 Episodes 1 & 2: Space Babies / The Devil's Chord Episode 3: Boom Episode 4: 73 Yards Episode 5: Dot and Bubble Episode 6: Rogue Episode 7: The Legend of Ruby Sunday Episode 8: Empire of Death Christmas special: Joy to the World 60th anniversary specials Special 1: The Star Beast Special 2: Wild Blue Yonder Special 3: The Giggle Christmas special: The Church on Ruby Road Flux / Series 13 Chapter one: The Halloween Apocalypse Chapter two: War of the Sontarans Chapter three: Once, Upon Time Chapter four: Village of the Angels Chapter five: Survivors of the Flux Chapter six: The Vanquishers New Year's Special: Eve of the Daleks Spring special: Legend of the Sea Devils BBC centenary special: The Power of the Doctor Series 12 Episode 1: Spyfall part one Episode 2: Spyfall part two Episode 3: Orphan 55 Episode 4: Nikola Tesla’s Night of Terror Episode 5: Fugitive of the Judoon Episode 6: Praxeus Episode 7: Can You Hear Me? 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